Written one year ago:
Sophia: Mommy, I am thinking about giving my bracelet to my friend. She would love this!
Mommy: That is so kind of you, my love.
S: I am having second thoughts though, because I like it, too.
M: You should think about it more, you can’t have it both ways.
S: I know Mommy, I cannot decide.
M: What would give you more joy, keeping it to yourself or giving it to your friend?
S: I don’t know…
M: What would you feel if a friend gave you something special?
S: I would be so happy, of course.
M: Then start weighing.
I was at a loss. I am sorry, my dear, Mommy was not much help. As an adult, you will face a lot more challenging situations. You will have to decide whether to think of yourself first, or other people. I believe you can love yourself and empathize with others, but it is tricky to strike a balance. Like, I also believe that what you cannot have you cannot give. So for instance, if you always prioritize others to the extent that it becomes detrimental to your own happiness, you are not only short changing yourself but also not doing the people around you any good.
I suppose most of the time, you can only hope you are doing the right thing, that you are being fair to yourself and other people. I would say choose what is good for yourself first, but that is being selfish. Always remember that what you say, and do, impacts other people and their lives, sometimes more than you could ever imagine.
How would you handle this?
Update: she gave it away.