Would You Rather Have Loved And Lost Or Never To Have Loved (And Lost) At All?

Exactly one year ago, you broke my heart into a million, billion pieces. I read your message and it seemed just like yesterday. The pain is still too real, too much, too raw. I sent you a letter then. Most are still applicable until now.

To my darling ex-fiance, the love of my life,

I am so in love with you, and I always will be. I have known you for almost 22 months now and you’ve shown me, and my daughter, nothing but kindness. You are a wonderful lover, and would’ve been the best husband I could ask for.

I had my heart broken too many times before, but nothing could have prepared me for this. I was dreaming of a future with you and our children.

I understand, my dear ex. I really do, but it does not make it any easier. In time I will be fine. And I’ll look back to our times together with a smile on my face, and I’ll be forever grateful for everything you have done for me and my daughter.

Fight, my love. I am sure a wonderful future is waiting for you. Find a woman who is so much better than me. I would be really hurt if she doesn’t treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

All the things we’ve dreamt about… please make it happen. Find someone who will hold your hand while walking along the shore, someone who will tie your shoelaces for you not only when your back hurts but every chance she gets, someone who will make you coffee everyday, someone who will understand when you want to talk and when you want to be left alone, someone who will sit on a rocking chair beside yours when you’re older, someone who will listen to your songs, someone who will be so grateful to wake up beside you every morning, someone who will make sure you are comfortable all throughout the night, someone who will be good to your children.

I only hope good things for you, my dear ex. Please get through this, and find the love and happiness you deserve.

I am letting you go now, not because I stopped loving you and not because I want to. But because i want to give you a chance to find the kind of love you need right now. Goodbye, my love. I hope someday we’ll see each other again, living the life we both deserve. I am sorry I could not keep my promise that I’ll be all you’ll ever need.

Don’t worry about me. I feel devastated and to be honest, I don’t know how to pick up the pieces again. But I will be fine.

Yours,
Sarah

I so hate myself for not being able to move on. I do not want to be that girl. I have tried everything possible but apparently, I am still stuck. I cannot even say out loud or write down your name, so I had to replace them with my dear ex in the letter above. As much fun as pining away for you has been, I need to try harder. How were you able to do it? I hate the fact that you forgot about me, us, just like that. I live to the day when I will truly be fine, just like you.

How do you recover from a broken heart?

#ToABetterSarah #WhatTheWorldNeedsNow #OneOfThoseDays #FromZeroToHero

07 Mar 2020. Our last photo together, I was wearing the same shirt from when we had our first lunch, 21 Sep 2018.

7 Comments

  1. I read somewhere, suffering is soo personal that it takes a lot of courage to speak about it without feeling judged. One day things would fall down at the right place where it is supposed to be. It’s just that the wait is difficult. You have been a strong person , just hold a little longer . I hope you overcome this phase and experience the sunshine 🌻 Sending many positive vibes and happy feelings ✨✨

    Like

    1. For the last eight months, writing has been a good outlet for me. Some say pain is a great inspiration to get creative, and maybe there is some truth to that. I cannot wait for the day that I will be writing because I am ecstatic! Thank you for dropping by. Sending love from Manila. 🤗

      Like

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